… and that leads to spiritual health. I think it also means that whatever we do repeatedly – we will become. 

Have you ever been looking for something and found it years later, hidden away at the bottom of your junk drawer?  Life is sometimes like that. Sometimes we don’t even know those things they are there. You end up saying to yourself: ”Oh, I’ve been looking for that for ages.”  Hold onto your hat. Today, I found some stuff hidden inside me that I had conveniently forgotten about. I took those things as past hurts and I didn’t consider the consequences to my faith.

Things get hidden in everyone’s lives. And some of the time it’s not deliberate sin, it’s carelessness. And this condition can be true for many kinds of attitudes. Some attitudes in our hearts are sneaky – they hide away under pious talk, and seemingly righteous indignation. But those things are not from the Lord, instead they are devices of our own choosing to hide ourselves from who we really are. I found a bunch of that stuff in my own life recently. 😱 Like this morning.

One way, over the years that I have learnt what is going on in my heart, is to carefully listen to what comes out of my mouth. Boy, that will scare the stuffing out of you! When I began to pray over the things I found in my thinking, I learnt that— lo and behold — my thinking in some areas was definitely not good. It nearly gave me indigestion! Hey, it’s great to watch your mouth, do it — but renewing our minds takes work and application, so we are going to need the Holy Spirit’s help with our thought lives too.  And that nicely leads into my thought for today.

I won’t digest whatever the Holy Spirit wants to teach me about myself, and the way I relate to Him and others, if I continually excuse myself. Even a flippant attitude can be a hiding place. The Lord is very thorough and kind with me. He often quotes me, to me. I hate it and love it … all at the same time. Sigh. Sometimes I wish the things I write every day will just kind of seep into my pores, rather than me having to work at it!  But obedience helps me with digestion, and I want His Word to be a part of me. … so-oo-….!!! On we go…

The thing is, none of us can afford to simply agree with what the Holy Spirit says without doing something about it. Now there’s the rub! I debated about whether to write about this subject today, and then hubby sent me an excellent, completely spot-on and appropriate scripture. I didn’t know whether to brain him, or thank him!! Of course I thanked him, and then I gave him one of those beautifully pious smiles, I’ve been talking about. 🙄 Meanwhile, eventually it turned out that I was measuring God and His actions, by the way I was raised> Now there’s a really dumb thing to do.

I know I cannot be gracefully transformed if I will not change my mind. And reading the bible is meant to be a heart searching event – not just a daily chore. So I started off with repentance, and in this whole process, I discovered something wonderful! The Lord is not legalistic. He is incredibly kind and generous!  I realised that I had yet another idea squirrelled away inside my heart, and it was a bad one. It needed to be changed because I don’t need to hold onto wrong concepts any longer. Father God is not like the ordinary sometimes sinful people that raised me, He’s perfect. Therefore I cannot put Him in the same category as my parental figures, because that will spoil our relationship.  

Praise God for a Saviour, because I find I need saving from myself all the time! I asked Him to forgive me for totally misjudging Him, and using my own human experiences as a reference for His actions. This sin had been hidden away deep inside, under pain, misunderstanding, despair, hopelessness, and just plain misery … that awful pile of stuff we all have that we hope no-one knows about … because we tell ourselves we ‘gotta be strong and courageous.’  Well I’m not. I’m weak and sometimes terrified and I definitely need His help all the time! 

This means that my active and interactive obedience has to come from owning my own questionable and inaccurate feelings. So I asked Him to replace them with how HE feels about me. And then I asked for a personal revelation of the kind of parent He is. I need one. I forgave all the people from the past who wrote all over my soul, “this is what love looks like.” Whether they did that on purpose or accidentally! And now I will take the time to meditate on every verse I read that tells me what He is like – and soak in it. 

“Why would you ever complain, O Jacob, or, whine, Israel, saying, “God has lost track of me. He doesn’t care what happens to me”? Don’t you know anything? Haven’t you been listening? God doesn’t come and go. God lasts. He’s Creator of all you can see or imagine. He doesn’t get tired out, doesn’t pause to catch His breath. And He knows everything, inside and out. He energises those who get tired, gives fresh strength to dropouts. For even young people tire and drop out, young folk in their prime stumble and fall. But those who wait upon God get fresh strength. They spread their wings and soar like eagles, They run and don’t get tired, they walk and don’t lag behind.” Isaiah 40:27-3.

Our willingness to obey and be taught by Him – as well being open to discover what’s really going on inside us – will help us digest the Word. The Holy Spirit doesn’t want to hurt us, He has been sent to help us. Bye. 👋