Search me

P 3173 Dumb things I have done.

/ DVH

Years ago we used to sing this song: “I’m comin’ back to the heart of worship, and it’s all about You. It’s all about You, Jesus. I’m sorry, Lord, for the thing I’ve made it. When it’s all about You. It’s all about You, Jesus.” (Matt Redmond.) That song is so sweet. There are moments when I think we don’t need any more new songs – we just need to pay better attention to the ones we are already singing!

On that very subject, many years ago we used to sing a song that I privately called the ‘Mahatma’ song. I called it that because two of the lines in the song consisted of three words that were easily run together in the rhythm of the melody. It went something like this: “that my heart might cling to you.’  It’s a fantastic thing to say to Him— but, unfortunately, around about the second time we sang it as a group, we began to rush the words together – because there are quite a lot of them! And as a consequence we all enthusiastically sang ‘mahatma’  instead of ‘my heart might.’ Mahatma, for those who have no idea, was a brand of rice in those days.

After a while, I couldn’t sing that song without falling over laughing. In my squirrelled up brain, it has been called ‘the mahatma song’ ever since. My brain is now officially under revision OK? The Holy Spirit is renewing it as we speak! Around the same time, there was also another song where people’s diction wasn’t always what it could be so some loving words became something else entirely! 

It also became a diagnostic tool for me! It too, used to make me fall over laughing. That is, until the Lord had words with me about it! A dear friend of mine years ago advised me: “don’t get taken to the wood shed about things you can fix.” It would have been nice if I had listened, but I giggled on. Sigh, my bad.

Trust me, you don’t want to go there. Especially when you know you are wrong, and the Lord is right. You can argue all you want, the only response is to get on your face!  The Holy Spirit lovingly explained to me that worship leaders pray over the songs that they sing, and my job was to follow the worship leader into worship.This process is not about what I like…it’s about what the Lord likes. Worship is not there to make me feel good. “It’s called submission” He said. ‘Remember the verse that which says submit to one another? Well this is one place where that verse applies.’ 

After I scraped myself up off the floor, I realised I had a superior attitude. I used to sing in a Madrigal group back in the ark – the donkeys were very good at harmony – and it transpired that I had a prideful attitude toward the way music was meant to go. Oh my! Pride hides in the darndest places. Meanwhile, Almighty God has angels who can sing better than any of us — so He isn’t all that bothered about the words or singing. Even if it is off-key, flat, sharp, or it has words that don’t make any sense … that doesn’t matter to Him. 

He listens to our hearts ‘singing and making melody to Him.’ I confess I still smile, a teeny bit, if I ever hear ‘the Mahatma song’ – but now I pull myself together and sing along with everyone else. My actual point is this —sometimes, in my own thinking, the scriptures that correct people often belong to someone else, and the ones that are sweet and faith building are mine! Not selfish or anything! 

‘Submit to one another’ doesn’t just mean people are supposed to submit to ME. It also means I need to submit to THEM. Now there’s a revelation nobody wants. Sadly, back then, I was merrily creating discord with my judgmental attitude. It really doesn’t say you only have to submit to the people you admire, respect or honour– it says each other because it means… each other! A-n-d it also doesn’t say … just tolerate or put up with each other either. Paul puts this great advice into a bigger context. “Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.” Ephesians 5:21. Even when we are singing!

Yeah that last step is a doozie. We can so easily excuse ourselves and accuse others! And then these things pile up like leaves outside our door, distracting and preventing us from freely entering into His Presence. At this point, we can try to feel better about ourselves by shoving our bad attitude onto the worship leader and blame them for supposedly, doing a bad job, BUT … the reality is, we can’t blame others! Well, we can, but it’s a really, really bad idea!  The problem lies within our own hearts. Meanwhile, I am sure you’ve never fallen down that particular hole like I did – you probably have your own holes instead! Now that I know about this one I am praying to stay away from those dumb things.

‘Search me O God and try me and see if there is any wicked way within me.’ Psalm 139:23&24. Half the time, we don’t know what we don’t know, and even though ignorance is bliss, it ain’t an excuse either.  Bye.👋

P 2164 Dealing with all kinds of pain.

/ DVH

“God, I invite Your searching gaze into my heart. Examine me through and through; find out everything that may be hidden within me. Put me to the test and sift through all my anxious cares. See if there is any path of pain I’m walking on, and lead me back to Your glorious, everlasting way— the path that brings me back to You.” Psalms 139:23-24 TPT

Wow. Talk about confronting the things we often want to avoid at all cost! Have you noticed how the Lord just loves to look in those dark hidden corners that we hope He doesn’t see? He does it to help us out of pain. Some places we go to in our minds and hearts, are not in line with His thinking, so we need to have Him examine us, and sort out what is behind them. We also need to recognise enemy attack. Obviously, we are told to resist satan, and press into the Lord instead. 

Any diagnosis needs some sort of treatment! The bible recommends humbling ourselves, and submitting to others, by inviting the Holy Spirit to search our hearts prayerfully with their help. We also need God’s help and wisdom to find the stuff we have hidden away, even from ourselves. Human beings are funny creatures, we don’t like to admit faults and failures, yet confessing that stuff is a pathway to a new place in Him. I’m not talking about getting so self-obsessed you turn yourself inside out, but there are the times to pray the search me prayer and submit yourself to Him … as well as someone else. We are not alone, anymore – let your Christian family comfort you.

It is also good, in those times, to ask someone to join you that you know will tell you the truth. None of this flattering, “Oh you’re OK, it’s just a bad day” junk! Other people can have a wider view than we do, they can see the results of our attitudes and actions. Unfortunately we sometimes only see or understand our own intentions. It is incredibly easy to confuse those two things. “For the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart.” Hebrews 4:12. We need the bible to help us sort out what is motivating us.

Many arguments that occur in a Christian home have been about what was intended. We need to carefully examine with His help – what was the real-life result! Our intentions don’t nullify what actually happened to someone else. Learn to listen to your spouse, your kids, and/or any people close to you who know you – let them reflect the YOU they see. Don’t hide behind hurt feelings, or fear of change, but open yourself up, because this is a normal part of growth. Real change comes from confronting the corners of your heart and it isn’t all bad stuff. Pain has a pathway – let’s dig up the pathway!

In times of anguish we do need the body. Other people who are more mature. Or perhaps someone who has experienced the kind of pain you are going through, to help straighten out our perspective. I ask myself a couple of questions, when or if, I don’t like the other person’s answer: “Why would this person lie to me? What have they got to gain?” Heads up! Most other people usually have nothing to gain and they are also running a big risk of alienating you. In my experience, people who tell you what you want to hear aren’t helpful – they want something.

Here is some stuff I have observed from just living. Pain numbs our spiritual senses and clouds our view of Who He is. It forcibly shoves us over into our minds … logical answers, and problem-solving. Then thinking-our-way-through-pain takes over. But, in reality, PAIN doesn’t actually diagnose the cause of anything! … So doing that won’t help us. Pain is a symptom, not the cause – a result, not the initial issue. 

Always remember, we don’t have to deny or hide our faults and sins anymore, because we know we have a Saviour! Plus, most of our faults etc. have a way of showing up so clearly that the people around us are well aware of them anyway! The bible tells us to humble ourselves, God will exalt us when He is good and ready. (Paul did it – Galatians 2) Even my enemies have something to teach me about myself. My immediate response to being around them is a sign post to what lies within ME!  👋🏻