Here are some things I’ve learnt over the years that have helped me with growing fruit, that lasts. My first bit of advice is that we need to do what He says. It will not help us to make excuses for ourselves, just do it anyway. And here’s the oddest thing like … ever! 🤪 The Holy Spirit’s fruit grows when we are not looking, and it grows from our deliberately chosen and carried out, obedience. This has taught me that we are not saved to be blessed … although we definitely are! Instead we are saved to be a blessing.
“I just want to obey all You ask of me. So teach me, Lord, for You are my God. Your gracious Spirit is all I need, so lead me on good paths that are pleasing to You, my One and only God!” Psalms 143:10.
When I first became a Christian I was one of those people that other ‘“normal” Christians avoided. I was just too enthusiastic. To be fair, it was a quiet little denominational church, and I was kind of a culture shock. Well, 50 years later I can say – “I think I’m worse, now!” Ha! Ha! … And I’m not sorry either. Growth is essential, even if we all have to learn the hard way sometimes, and growth means changing. Some things have taken me years to learn. I’d purpose in my heart not to make that mistake again, and then fall down the same hole, because my own feelings and previous hurts sucked me in.
Learning to forgive over and over again is difficult. Some people just keep re-offending, no matter how often you ask them to ‘please, stop!’ No wonder Jesus said we must forgive others even if our brother offends us 490 times in a day! Sadly, some people seem to have perfected the offending others skill, into an art form. Over time I’ve learnt that the people around me probably won’t change when I need them to, instead I needed to change my response to their sin. I’m definitely going to need the Holy Spirit’s help to do that!
For years the Lord taught me that obedience is better than sacrifice, so I learnt to obey whatever He asked me to do, whenever He told me to do it. Sometimes when I did those faith things for Him, I looked like a goose … but most of the time, I saw HIM in action. Boy watching God work after you’ve given Him room, is incredibly addictive … in a good way. 😊 You can’t wait to obey again, trust me!! Meanwhile looking like a goose is kind of good for excessive pride – win-win!
However, I still had no victory over some negative stuff from my childhood. I’d go up the front and get prayed for, and a few days later all my good will had worn off and I would go back down the hole again. What helped me in the end was my commitment to obedience. Whenever the Holy Spirit told me to go and help somebody, I did that immediately. But until the Lord revealed His Ways to me, I did not understand that changing my character happens the same way.
I kept asking Him to do it for me. I think I expected that I would just wake up one day different, and it would all be easy. I knew He wanted to help me with these things, it says so in the book! But I failed to realise that I had to step out in faith and do the exact thing I thought and felt I couldn’t do – just because He had said it, and that’s also in the book. Instead, I had to learn to monitor myself – one conversation, one thought, one interaction at a time. I needed to say NO to my grumpy impulses born from all that pain, and ask Him to heal me. Our hearts are born to bear fruit – but His fruit cannot grow in an angry broken heart. The fruit of the Spirit needs a new soft heart toward others to grow so I had to learn to let Him soften my heart toward the people who continually hurt me.
Saying no to our natural impulses in the heat of a moment, begins the process of growing the fruit of self-control. Self-control grows out of that obedience, as His acceptance of us takes over our thinking. Proverbs says: “He who guards his mouth preserves his life, But he who opens wide his lips shall have destruction.” And James 3:2 also taught me a secret. He said this: “We all stumble in many ways. Anyone who is never at fault in what they say is perfect, able to keep their whole body in check…”
I discovered that mastering my inner pain was dependant on my choices to obey what He said, in the book. He taught me that obedience counts. Not just to do this or that good work He prepared for me before I was ever born – it also helps me overcome my failings. This way of life has been my constant learning curve ever since. When I do what He says, I do well and experience victory – when I don’t I fall down a hole and feel sorry for myself … and get up and go again!
The same obedience that I use to do His will, can form my character, one chosen step at a time. 👋🏻
