Strife

P 2679 Stress – the peace devourer.

/ DVH

This is the dictionary’s interpretation of the word – STRESS: great worry caused by a difficult situation. People under a lot of stress may experience headaches, minor pains, and sleeping problems  As if life isn’t difficult enough!

Here are some of my own thoughts about combating stress. I believe exercise can help. Repetitive gentle stretching and moderate exercise gives my brain more oxygen to work with! Plus I use intentional breathing. I quiet my emotions and thoughts by simply concentrating on my breathing. And a few good night’s sleep in a row can help! Also do something fun to break the cycle of “I’ve gotta be, gotta do, gotta go, gotta help …” Instead prioritise helping yourself to get rid of the stress. Stressful people ain’t fun to be around!!

I think parents often find themselves striving to keep their kids lives on an even keel. When kids are on edge so is everyone else! My advice is to let them practice fixing their own problems, instead of adding their problems into your list! I do this all the time. 🙄 Older kids need to be given opportunities to resolve conflict and trouble for themselves – it’s a much needed life-skill. I’d encourage them to ask the Lord to help, but I would also pray for them. The thing is, we often problem solve things for our kids because if they are stressed then they over-stress us and … round and round we go! Pray God will help them and step away. If they are too young to think things through, then present them with two alternative answers to their barrage of questions – tell them the answer is this OR that.

Laughter and humour are great stress breakers. But if you are dealing with another person I recommend that you explain you are not laughing AT them – otherwise war may break out! Watch something you like on TV, that is not stressful. I use Youtube a lot. I put on some Tim Janis or Dappy T Keys and I just listen and watch the pictures! That stuff is like peace on a stick. It’s incredibly peaceful. Or you can listen to music that you like. Sit and read a book and zone out. If you are going to read the bible then read your favourite Psalms. Just don’t read great big swatches of it – it is better to soak, not study. Just read a couple of verses that show you how much God loves you, and regularly pause while reading, to let it sink in. 

People often behave irrationally when they are under stress – it is not intentional – stress has a way of sneaking up on all of us. The thing is, if you are stressed then it is more than likely the rest of your family will pick up on it and they will eventually join in! I believe stress is the cause of more disagreements and strife in our everyday lives than we actually realise. You can’t think your way out of it – because over-thinking got you into it!  FYI, none of us have the ability to solve a whole lot of problems all at once! Just saying …

Stress can tip over into worry when we are unaware of it. The mind winds up and shoots off in a number of directions trying to solve every problem in our universe  – then, quite naturally, our mind objects to being overtaxed because we are not made to deal with a whole lot of problems all at once! I recommend prioritising. Make lists if it helps but remember to cross things off the list once you have accomplished them. Human beings need the feeling of winning, of gaining ground, to help us keep on moving forward. So do celebrate your successes – do it on purpose!

There have been times in my life when I have forgotten what I was stressed about, (good thing!) but then I drove myself nuts trying to remember what I forgot. (Bad thing!!)  At the same time, I have been known to annoy people in my near vicinity with my somewhat over-emphasised problem-solving attempts on their behalf. A problem-solving person may not be what a stressed person needs! I found that out the hard way. Suggestions can just muddy the waters and frustrate everyone.

I have left the best until last. God does not want us to live this life like a frayed end. Please don’t leave the Lord out. He wants IN. He wants to show Himself strong and active on our behalf. I have often made the mistake of thinking that the best way for God to help me, is for Him to solve all my problems. Wrong! God is not our personal problem solver any more than He is our personal trainer! His aim is for us to get through the difficulties holding onto His hand, totally at peace and releasing that peace into the atmosphere around us.

John 14:27 says:“Peace I leave with you; My peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.” How do we enter this peace? There’s this groovy little word called “let,” it means “allow.” When we find ourselves buzzing about like a bumble bee trapped by a window, it is time to realise that we have let ourselves be overwhelmed by the circumstances. Time to stop and pray about letting things go and handing them over to Him. See all the above suggestions … I told you I like to make them!! 😊 Lastly, fix the things you can with His help, but relinquish the ones you can’t. Bye. 👋

P 2582 More on a heart like David.

/ DVH

The Lord said of His servant David, that “this is a man after My own heart”. (1 Samuel 13:14) It seems to me it is comparatively easy to pray:“Oh Lord please give me a heart like David had!”…in a moment of love and passion toward God Himself … with no understanding of what that means!  Will we blame God for not answering that prayer – when we ignore the opportunities He sends our way?

Think on this: if you and I really want a heart like David had, then God Himself will need to send us the kind of opportunities DAVID had! Hearts are formed, they do not fall on us. Here’s quick revision of David’s life — this young man was overlooked in his family. His earthly father forgot he had him and obviously thought the boy was not as promising as his six brothers were!  Did David moan about that? No! Instead he learnt about God in the middle of a pasture doing a job that was beneath his stature. This was where he learnt about soaking in God’s ways. That’s where he learnt to make the Lord his priority. He wrote beautiful Psalms… instead of complaining about his lowly position and the weather.

David chose God’s ways over his own human desires, many times. We all know about his failure and the subsequent consequences, but there were so many other times that David chose to honour the Lord despite his circumstances. His responses to his life were way above most men’s natural tendencies. He did not do that to curry favour with God, BTW, he did it because that was who he was! Soaking in God’s beauty had shaped his heart, and his responses came from that heart of love toward the Father. 

So if WE want a heart like David, then maybe we will have to fight our own Goliath and WIN. We all have Goliaths in our lives, and we often feel ill-equipped to fight them. But David took what he had – which was belief in Who Almighty God is – and defeated his enemy. There may also be a possibility that we will have to honour somebody in our lives just like King Saul, David’s persecutor of 20 years. Simply because that person is God’s choice to shape US… by handing out constant oppression! Maybe our tormentor has been tormenting us for years too!!

Let’s look at David’s response when his little baby boy died… “After Nathan had gone home, the Lord struck the child that Uriah’s wife had borne to David, and he became ill. David pleaded with God for the child. He fasted and spent the nights lying in sackcloth on the ground. On the seventh day the child died …” 2 Samuel 12:15-18. 

After his baby’s death, David’s servants were reluctant to tell him the little one was gone, but he figured it out. Then he does an extraordinary thing — it seems almost totally incomprehensible. He gets up, washes himself, and asks for food. Why on earth would he do that? You know when I think about his response it blows me away. This man is so concerned about doing God’s will, God’s way, once the Lord’s plan is revealed – He leaves the whole thing alone and goes back into ordinary life, immediately. Boy is that living this life surrendered!  

Much later, David actively sets out to find someone left in Saul’s house … even after Saul and Jonathan had died. He wants to do his enemy’s family good. (Now there’s a grand illustration of doing good to your enemies!) Despite his warrior life, this man of God had such integrity before the Lord. It all sprang from his deep love for God, not obligation, or religious duty. Those Psalms he wrote came right out of his own experiences! Instead of cultivating despair, anger and jealousy – David cultivated a sweet heart.

It may be that we too have lost else someone so dear to us, like David did, when his older son Absalom died. But David was not able to mourn Absalom … imagine that! He’s a leader, his sheep come first! He puts his grief aside, in order to be a good leader and king to his subjects. Funny how God picks ordinary people like that quite often. Think about it.

These are just some ?highlights? After all David’s life was filled with war and betrayal! If we truly want a heart like he had, maybe we are going to need some panel-beating first! That, and a sweet, spontaneous heart-response under pressure. God Himself forges men and women in the furnaces of trouble, pestilence, war, sorrow and strife. We must simply choose to learn His ways, they won’t fall on us.

Here’s my last thought – right after the Holy Spirit fell at Pentecost, persecution for the gospel’s sake broke out. But Father God had a purpose, He wanted the disciples to disperse to spread the gospel further. So, instead of becoming a jolly, happy, worshipping group, who enjoyed their new life together teaching the same things over and over again … persecution and bad experiences are now their teacher.

 We will have troubles and strife in this life, and this means God is working on our hearts. To have a heart like David we will need to be changed. 👋 “Create in me a clean heart O, Lord, and renew a right spirit within me.” Amen!