P3407 Getting older in the computer age. šŸ¤Ŗ

Today I was reflecting on the different stages of my life and remembering a little bit about when I was younger. The only thing I cared about as a teenager was … does my hair look OK? Is my lippy on straight? Eventually, at 20, I married, and started having kids. That’s what you did back there in the ark – only truly brave people did something else. Having kids changed my whole outlook.Ā 

When you have kids what you look like comes last! Instead you care more about getting all of them in the car at the same time, plus finding the car keys. Now my hubby does all that running about, and my job is to say ā€œof courseā€ to any suggestion he makes because he has the conn, not me. I don’t miss being in charge, because this life seems to have gotten so complicated. Not only for me, but everyone around me as well. I thought computers were meant to simplify things!Ā 

These days, my personal-computer-that-sits-on-my-neck-and-shoulders starts forgetting stuff around about mid afternoon. It is a waste of time getting impatient with yourself when you are forgetful. A bit of a snooze helps. While I am relaxing my brain it gives it a chance to hobble on over to the old style filing system in my head to find the answer. There is no zippy or flash modern NBN computer ruling in my head, just a bunch of memories of other days.

Today I ended up laughing a lot, as I thought about my history with those old-style main frame computers. Computers joined the banking scene not long after I did, I was 14 at the time. These monsters took up whole rooms and each room was devoted to only a few tasks. Before that most of the banking work was done by various levels of complex adding machines, and people. Even then, computers threatened real people and their jobs! We never even dreamt we would one day wear a computer on our wrist or in our glasses.

You know, curiosity is a marvellous, useful thing – especially when it comes to faith – but back when I was still a kid, it just made me a pest!Ā  I have no clue what’s in the innards of my tiny little Temu count-your-steps watch, – a teeny tiny motherboard perhaps? But long, long ago, I was given an actual wind-it-up-yourself watch … no batteries thank you … by my favourite uncle. It was a fancy one, I was bored and about ten, so I eventually pulled it apart and put it back together again. It mostly worked well after that… it just got a bit poorly from time to time. The parental response to my curiosity was that I had the hand of learning applied to the seat of knowledge, and sitting down became far more complicated.

Anyway, in my time in the banking sector, I had a lovely friend who made me laugh so much I used to have to hold on to something to stay uprightĀ  … and neither of us drank! She would walk past these you-beaut, brand new, ooh-ahh computers, grinĀ at me with a twinkle in her eye …and say: ā€œWatch this!ā€ And then she’d throw a single paper clip into the aperture at the front. At that moment, one of two things happened. The machine would ignore it … OR …it made all kinds of truly dreadful noises and then paper went everywhere! That machine vomited reams of perforated paper all over the floor. It just kept on spewing out paper. It took maintenance quite a while to get the stupid thing up and running again. Meanwhile we tried to look innocent and busy, all at the same time. Back then we thought computers were great because they gave us time off. These days I remain unconvinced that computers improve our lives – they seem to consume most of our time instead.

In the past few years, I have been kept informed by my son about the computer scene, he is a very talented computer programmer. He very patiently taught me how to write in HTML! That fact still surprises me. Yes, I really can write in the most basic computer language. My son talks to me about computers, but, sad to say, now I hear waves instead of information and instructions. I nod and listen. It is amazing what you can learn if you nod, smile, and keep your mouth shut. You can even look pr-et-ty smart that way. Most days, I do find my laptop is extremely useful, simply because my handwriting ain’t what it used to be.

I said all that to say this … one of the dumbest things I think Christians can do is to mistake knowledge for application. Those things are not the same.ā€œNow about food offered to idols: of course we know that all of us possess knowledge [concerning these matters. Yet mere] knowledge causes people to be puffed up (to bear themselves loftily and be proud), but love (affection and goodwill and benevolence) edifies and builds up and encourages one to grow [to his full stature].ā€ 1 Corinthians 8:1.

The bible tells us that knowledge puffs up, and it becomes a big hurdle regarding true humility – it keeps us from God’s kind of love. There sure were a few big headed people back in the computer section of the banking ark. Yet I want to thank God for my mischievous friend back then, who taught me machines aren’t everything. Bye šŸ‘‹.

P 2791 Let’s simplify life.

There are many kinds of difficulties in this life, and they occur because real life is not full of rainbows, unicorns and happy endings with blue birds! Instead we get to live day by day with ever-increasing complicated systems that don’t work. Yet our daily delight is to advertise the Lord by the way we treat others – even when they annoy the living daylights out of us.

The other day hubby was explaining stuff very carefully to a person, or maybe it was AI  …whatever-it-was on the other end of the phone! Meanwhile it took him 15 minutes to reach a voice!  AI? Actually it could have been someone who was not the brightest light bulb in the box. He explained to whoever it was on the other end —— that he did not want to be transferred to their local office, because he had already phoned there and they didn’t supply what he wanted. He needed another outcome please. The person listened, said ā€œone moment pleaseā€ and immediately transferred him to the place he just said he didn’t want to go! There’s a test on self control coming up!!

He went round the merry-go-round three four times before he found someone who was a genuine, regular, breathing proper person. And NO! We will not tell you where that real person is, we found her … she’s ours! Find your own. My hubby loathes phoning large companies. He would honestly rather walk to Alice Springs, than phone the gas company, the electricity company, the bank, the insurance people, the hospital or the government … that last one will really show you where your heart is! It’s an ace diagnostic tool!

It’s not just the wasted time, it’s also the wretched ā€œhold pleaseā€ music, which is never to your taste and incredibly loud … but you can’t turn it down. So you have to hold the phone away from the your ear, and that means you can miss out on the little voice, that turns up … after 3 months, and if you miss them, then … you go round and round again! “You are tenth in the queue … you are 24th in the queue … ” Huh? How come I went backward? I told hubby the other day when he had been on the phone for hours, circling the drain – that it is OK to be furious with AI!! 

Eventually, when you get off the phone you want to get rid of that explosion of fury you’ve built up, because you want  to walk in Grace. No wonder some people have thinning hair – they must have been pulling it out in frustration. The directions drive you nuts! Press 1, press 7 … press 484 … that’ll get ya where you want to go  …or not! You can end up playing word bingo and you have to guess the right word. Some organisations are like MI6. You need a password to get in!

I’m old! When I use the phone I am hoping to talk to a real person, with a name, and hopefully an address, A proper human VOICE on the other end, that actually understands my questions. I do not want ABU DHABI, I want to find my parcel! And how the heck did it end up in Abu Dhabi in the first place? The other week hubby had to press one cyclic number so many times —because the list of possible destinations for the call were so large that he couldn’t remember them. And he had to start again .. five times! He was stuck like that on the phone for hours — getting nowhere. It’s like hurtling along on a roller coaster. It’s a terrible ride and you can’t get off. Plus you need a rubbish bin to throw up into when it finishes.

BUT, if you don’t phone, then you run the risk of having whatever service that you-suddenly-instantly-wish-you-didn’t-have … cut off! You are informed by the ā€˜voice’ you must be polite, not sexist, not racist, not homophobic or religious or angry or they will terminate the call.Yet they seem to enjoy poking the bear!! Sigh. Apparently the police can turn up at your house tomorrow to carry you off to Abu Dabi — where hopefully you just might find your parcel!  After you’ve been on the phone for hours, you need a strong cup of coffee, a nice sticky bun and a long lie down. 

AI, BTW, is not even remotely helpful because it doesn’t have enough options — especially the one YOU want! Tragically we are all sunk, forevermore. At the same time is incredibly galling to see advertisements telling us how convenient their phone systems are. I do hope they find Alice in that Wonderland!

I think the Lord Jesus was incredibly wise to have entered this world at a time when life was so much simpler! After these phone call episodes we have found ourselves longing for a life without phones, and their accompanying annoying institutions. The government in Jesus’ day simply killed you if you bothered them. And if you were sick, then Jesus healed you – or you died!  A simple life is the thing, that’s what I say. 

So if you do get trapped on a phone going round and round for days, try singing your favourite Christian songs loudly so you don’t lose your cool.  NOTE OF WARNING — but not into the receiver because you are not allowed to be religious. You might also read the bible out loud – again — not into the phone!  Bye ā€¦šŸ“ž