Self-justification

P 3069 Our true purpose.

/ DVH

The more we live our lives focussed on our God-given purpose, the stronger that purpose becomes. Jesus Christ’s purpose is now our purpose. We inherited His calling. So now we are here to destroy the works of the evil one, and present God’s goodness to a world that already has a very bad definition of goodness!! However, if what we believe is an extra, or an add-on, then we will have very little grace to give away to others. Meanwhile whether the other people deserve what I am giving them or not, is Jesus’ territory not mine!

In really difficult circumstances, each one of us can experience a bankruptcy of faith, and end up doing the opposite of what we know to be true. Simply because the external and internal pressure can appear to get bigger than our knowledge of His Grace toward us. So we need to access His Love and Grace daily, because the bank of suck-it-up-buttercup, will fail! Sadly, when I try to deal with stuff in my own strength, that is often when I end up giving someone else an unwanted piece of my mind. Nastiness is such a waste of time, however, knowing our true purpose helps us to hone our spiritual attributes and instincts.

The Lord Jesus wants us to go to Him when we need His Grace, His Love, His Faith, because He has more than we will ever need! At the same time He also longs to lavish His love on us daily. Plus He wants us to grow up into His likeness – that’s our true purpose.

His help also includes whatever we need when we are dealing with other people. Other people can stretch our faith mercilessly, and when our faith is being stretched, it becomes harder to access His Grace and Love. That’s the growing edge. It helps me to remember that no matter what else is going on, Jesus’ love was always “on” so His Grace is essential in everything we do.

Grace helps me realise God doesn’t take sides – He is for all of us. I have no idea how He does that! Instead I go with the thought that He’s God, and so He can do the impossible! Sadly I often need a whole lot of roadwork to get there. However, He is so gracious, He will answer my prayer for help – even if it is half-hearted!

I don’t know what circumstances will present themselves today, unexpectedly… or when I will need His Grace to disarm fear, rejection, resentment etc. in myself. or from someone else. Grace is a great equaliser. However I don’t distribute His Grace like a powerful person would bestow a favour – instead, grace becomes a part of who I am, and giving it away is normal. I have learnt from experience, that if I tell Him I need it, He will always give it to me. I just need to  to ask Him! If I can control ME, by staying in the Grace of God, then I don’t need to control YOU!

My Faith in Who He is, and what He did for us all, is  an important foundation to anything that happens. My faith won’t be built up if I am not using it – because it needs to be stretched, and exercised – bit by bit. Meanwhile, five cents worth of faith probably won’t be all that useful when the sky is falling! I like to start my days by acknowledging that I need Him. He says He will supply everything I need, so that means I go right past my own efforts to look good, or feel justified, and focus on HIS CHARACTER instead.

That’s the only sure thing in the middle of chaos. Who He is. My own needs or irritations can easily cloud any issues, but fortunately, His Character is unchanging! If I choose to only use my faith like I am just renting it, or borrowing it – I will quite quickly find out I’ve sprung a leak! I must take ownership of my own faith! Faith is not faith when it is not owned, or used – instead it is more like wishful thinking. Faith needs to be visible and demonstrated. That demonstration pulls faith from the realm of the unknown, into this known world.

Our loving actions toward others can display our faith better than our words ever could. This also means I will choose to not put my focus on spiritual gifts, but rather I choose to focus on building Grace, Love, and Faith into my life as He leads me. Those other things will get ‘added unto me’ when I choose to concentrate on living a life of love, not self-centred defensiveness and anger. 

The need to change often appears in the form of a difficult problem, a destructive person, an impossible situation, or when things suddenly seem to be going upside down. Finding the Lord’s eternal attributes in those moments means I must deliberately decide to yield to Him. What I mean by that is this — I give up! I stop trying to find a solution, or an exit, or an excuse for my cranky attitude, and instead I wait for Him to lead me through the drama in front of me. Instant solutions are over-rated, sometimes all we learn from them is self-justification and presumption.   

Love is the kingdom we deliberately choose to live in. Grace is Jesus’ coin of that realm, and using our Faith to get those things, is the way to access whatever we need to fulfil His purpose in our lives. Bye. 👋

“Here’s another way to put it: You’re here to be light, bringing out the God-colours in the world. God is not a secret to be kept. We are going public with this, as public as a city on a hill…” Matthew 5:14-16.

P 2698 Some things really are as plain as the nose on your face.

/ DVH

Thank God we always have HIS MIRROR! The bible clearly reveals to us that we cannot love God and hate our brother. “We love because He first loved us. Whoever claims to love God yet hates a brother or sister IS A LIAR. For whoever does not love their brother and sister, whom they have seen, cannot love God, whom they have not seen. And He has given us this command: Anyone who loves God must also love their brother and sister.” 1 John 4:19-21. And just in case we think we can wiggle out of that particular idea on a technicality, Jesus Himself answered the whole …  “Just who is my brother?” scenario, brilliantly, in the story of the Good Samaritan. He made it clear, my brother or sister is the person I want to avoid, or the person I blame for making ME feel bad!

We can be easily fooled into missing out on our new life in Christ’s life-giving lessons, by dismissing our own personal responsibility to fix things. Being reconciled means humbling yourself not just shoving the blame off onto the other person. We can’t just silently excuse or dismiss our need to cherish Him, and His Word above everything else, and hope He won’t notice! Fixing stuff isn’t just a process of negotiation, and agreement – true reconciliation means we can go back to walking with each other in love, as quickly as possible. The aim is change – not pretending! Self-deception is the worst kind of deception.

“Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everyone. If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” says the Lord.” Romans 12:17-19. Personally, I ask the Lord for His help to sort me, and the other person out. I let Him know I am happy with what He wants to do about it, either way. And I aim to take the low road – because I probably did something or other! His Presence is way more important to me than my ego. People who protect themselves have fragile egos and, sadly, they can easily miss opportunities to die to self.

I recommend true reconciliation with others highly, because that action quickly diagnoses all the greebilies that hang around, unnoticed, in our own lives. These creepy critters disguise themselves as terrible wounds that have been inflicted on us – and that means many times we avoid the stab-ber like the plague. Have you ever noticed how dead-set easy it is to prove your point and get sympathy for your sorrow when somebody hurts you and everybody else can see it was their fault? My advice is to give sympathy a swerve and go for the Gold – walking with Jesus.

Oh the temptation to feel justified can be such a battle. We can easily want to bad mouth that person who did us so much harm! We can end up collecting other people who agree with our assessment of the perpetrator’s behaviour like we’d collect postage stamps! The temptation rises up to go over and over the events in our mind, revisiting what we should have said to put that other person in their place. Of course YOU don’t do that … and … neither do I! Where is the faith in self-justification? Nobody should owe anybody anything but LOVE … and that situation is only diagnosed by the One Who paid it all.

Unless we choose to leave our fate in His hands, we can end up wasting our time and effort trying to paint a picture of how right WE are and how wrong the other person is. Of course they are wrong! It’s often as plain as the nose on anyone’s face who is at fault. But the real point is this … our response is our response. And guess what? The only thing we have any power over is OUR RESPONSE. Um … ‘turn the other cheek, and walk the extra mile’ seem familiar to me.  You know if Jesus had avoided the toxic people WE WOULD ALL BE DEAD IN OUR SIN!

Yes, I know I am advocating letting that person who hurt you or I go free! But that’s what Jesus did for US, and He didn’t put any caveats on what He did either… He died once for all. That’s what the book says. So that serial killer who has despatched numerous people in ghastly ways… can stand on the same ground I do. GRACE. Sin is a great leveller, and fast recognition of what I’ve done, is a brilliant way to get humble quickly! That murderer can change their life too, just like I did. Meanwhile it is so dumb to keep lists of things anyone did! Just give it all to Jesus quickly, and make sure that you fix things with that other person too – to both people’s satisfaction.  

The thing that has a permanently lasting effect on us is to value Him above all the bumps, breakages and bruises this life hands out. It’s as plain as the nose on your face. My advice is …keep your mirror handy – we all need it! Bye. 👋

P 2621 Responding rather than reacting.

/ DVH

Reactions are easy-peasy. Somebody does or says something daft or provocative … or maybe we are having a bad day — and bingo bongo! — our response is not exactly excellent. Sadly that dratted ball starts rolling down the hill and the other person says or does something that gets under our skin. And then the bad stuff … the stuff we sorta kinda hoped wasn’t in there, inside us, starts bubbling out … e-v-e-r-y-where. Sigh. After that, maybe we are a tiny bit ashamed, because we feel that we ought to do better. But then that thought quickly flies out of the window. and we slam the window shut behind it … so it can’t get back in and stop us, as we settle in to dissect someone else’s life and attitudes!

OR … we half-apologise for bagging some poor schmuck who has no idea what they just did! But then, a little while later, because we are not done with feeling offended yet … and now they are looking at us funny ..  we pick it up where we left it and keep right on going …!! This sometimes means that we have made a decision that we need sympathy or understanding, more than spiritual growth. Suddenly we are dragging out every single thing this person ever said or did that hurt us, to add to the glorious bonfire of ‘poor me,’ we just built. Afterward, we can’t for the life of us figure out where that roaring blaze came from! … while we are sitting in the smouldering ruins of REGRET.

OR … maybe we FEEL JUSTIFIED be-cau-se of the way we’ve been treated. After all, ‘they said this and they did that! And what are we supposed to do after they were so mean to us? After all we are only human!’ ….even bigger sigh. Justifying ourselves is the first step down the slipperiest slide in the world. The thing is, to continue the ride down that slide we will probably have to give examples of their badness – usually to someone else who has ears the size of Dumbo the elephant. Someone who knows how to make sympathetic noises, because they too have their own bad people who don’t understand them either!

If we are particularly miffed at someone we may even talk to several different people about the offender, collecting ‘votes’ for or against the other person’s behaviour! That’s a really dumb idea that leads to self-justification. Of course I know that nobody reading this has never bin there and dun any of that!! Me neither! However, if I were Pinocchio, my nose would be out of the house and down the street by now.  My point is this, we opt for sympathy and ‘oh you poor dear,‘  rather than clinging to Christ and what He did for us, and doing what He would do. Psalm 31:1-4.

Jesus said NOTHING. He did NOTHING. He gave his back to those tormentors… Isaiah 53:7,8a. ”He was oppressed and afflicted, yet He did not open His mouth; He was led like a lamb to the slaughter, and as a sheep before its shearers is silent, so He did not open His mouth. By oppression and judgment He was taken away….” …If we want to follow Jesus Christ, our precious Master and beloved Friend, then we will need to take the road He chose. His road had a huge cost and it ended up on a cross.

Mean, critical, spiteful people are our personal cross to bear. And most of us have a few of them, hanging about. Time for the dance of joy! 🥳 🎉 Remaining silent in the face of criticism and someone else’s miserable … or even accurate … opinions of us and our behaviour, seems impossible. But Christ did it. That means He knows how to do it and the Holy Spirit can get us through it. We can learn to respond instead of reacting. He died to give us the same power He used.

How? Well, I recommend saying nothing, and praying “help help” over and over again, until we begin to feel His peace … ‘which passes all our understanding!’  Then we wait until we feel it starting to settle down over our hearts, and then we cling to it like a limpet. Philippians 4:7. His peace makes no sense to my mind but it is the most blessed thing E-V-E-R. Anger disappears. It goes away even more when I apologise for getting angry with the other person … even if they started in on me first. It actually grows as I fix my mind on Him. However, I can be tempted back into my reactionary attitude if the other person hasn’t got the same script I am reading from, and they start being unpleasant again! I need to pray that His peace will be more valuable to me than making my point or feelings known. 

I must conclude by saying that I am still learning this process, and I fail a lot… I’ve always been a last-word-Lana kind of gal. (Apologies to anyone out there who is called Lana – I don’t mean you … I just liked the alliteration! 🤪) Which means once I am wound up, unwinding me becomes difficult. But nothing is too hard for the Holy Spirit – including me. I have realised that my faith in His ability needs to be greater, than my own faith in my bad attitudes!

Responding to the Holy Spirit is way better than reacting to someone else, because it can change the outcome … and on some occasions, it even changes the outcome on both sides. Bye. 👋