Parents

P 2445 Have you got the wrong driver?

/ DVH

“Love never brings fear, for fear is always related to punishment. But love’s perfection drives the fear of punishment far from our hearts. Whoever walks constantly afraid of punishment has not reached love’s perfection.” 1 John 4:18 TPT. Now that’s what I am talking about … having the right driver! Pause and think on: ‘love never brings fear!’ 🧐 

Today I want to talk about allowing the Holy Spirit to drive the ‘car’ of our lives. It is good to stop and prayerfully assess what is behind some of our thought processes regularly, because all kinds of sneaky Pete things can hide in places that we cannot see. Unfortunately, sometimes we can take our thoughts very casually. The answer of course, is to run our thoughts by Him.

After we have given our situation to Him – the secret to overcoming those things, is to LEAVE THEM WITH THE HOLY SPIRIT. Refuse to pick stuff up again – unless He gives you specific instructions. Then you should carry them out! Tell yourself: “That’s that thing I gave to God and He is acting on my behalf.” Once you have handed stuff over, don’t start trying to figure it out. Leave it with Him. That’s what trust looks like. Make room for time with the Holy Spirit when you are reading the bible, that’s how we renew our minds. Simply reading the bible does not do that. Pray, wait for answers, and then act on what He says. If He says do nothing – then do nothing. 

You know, most of us learnt our thinking patterns before we met Jesus — little babies do not have filters that can keep out fear. Fear can also be handed down from one generation to the next. Things like over protective parents, absent parents, disinterested parents — all these things can create situations where fear will take advantage of us. Obviously parents try very hard to avoid those kinds of scenarios – I know I did! But kids pick up on the darndest things and what frightens one will make another one laugh. Fear is sneaky, it takes advantage of innocence and trust and our minds go spinning off into mental situations that actually don’t apply. 

Like the above scripture says: the antidote to fear is His LOVE. I cannot stress enough how important it is for His love to go from being a theory, or even a pretty thought, into being something we can cling to when the whole world is madly swinging and swaying and nothing seems to be where you want it to be. His love needs to undergird everything we know and do… because God’s love is always constant and He loves us consistently. The river of His love flowing toward us never ever alters. We must get rid of the idea that answers to prayer prove His love toward us. His love is established by what He did when He sent His Son Jesus to die. It is clearly documented for all to see in the bible.

Fear can be a paralysing emotion. For years, certain bodily symptoms would send me into fear. Fear of pain, fear that I would not be able to escape from it.  Even fear of being trundled off into hospital!  Sometimes fear can even be ruling our lives;  yet we can be totally unaware of it. Someone might say: “I am not afraid of heights” … But they don’t go anywhere near the edge when they are in high places, or look down. Another person might have more than enough money to manage their lives comfortably, but they live in severe restricted conditions and refuse to spend a penny unless they absolutely have to. That’s FEAR!

If we are afraid, and we know it, the antidote for that malady is to ask, and keep on asking, for a real revelation of the love of God. Make this subject for study, every time you read the words “God loves you” …highlight them. MAKE A LIST. Read it often. Keep deliberately adding to those revealed truths you have. We can never have enough insight into how powerful and all encompassing God’s love is.

Obey what He tells you to do. We can do nothing without Him, and fear will restrict us from stepping into this new life He died to give us. That includes fear of punishment, fear of loss, fear of error, fear of missing out , fear of being cheated or mistreated, fear of losing self… all of these things can rob us of the certainty that God loves us so dearly and nothing can separate us from His kind of love. 

We must not beat ourselves up when we are afraid – that’s called compounding the felony!! It is a huge mistake to tolerate fear, and hide from what it does to us internally. The verse above gives us the diagnosis of where we are with fear: “Love never brings fear, for fear is always related to punishment. But love’s perfection drives the fear of punishment far from our hearts. Whoever walks constantly afraid of punishment has not reached love’s perfection.” Keep walking toward His love, and choose the right driver for your daily walk with Him. Bye. 👋🏻

P 2401 It’s good for us, but sometimes we fight against it.

/ DVH

“In this all-out match against sin, others have suffered far worse than you, to say nothing of what Jesus went through—all that bloodshed! So don’t feel sorry for yourselves. Or have you forgotten how good parents treat children, and that God regards you as His children? My dear child, don’t shrug off God’s discipline, but don’t be crushed by it either. It’s the child He loves that He disciplines; the child He embraces, He also corrects.God is educating you; that’s why you must never drop out. He’s treating you as dear children.

This trouble you’re in isn’t punishment; it’s training, the normal experience of children. Only irresponsible parents leave children to fend for themselves. Would you prefer an irresponsible God? We respect our own parents for training and not spoiling us, so why not embrace God’s training so we can truly live? While we were children, our parents did what seemed best to them. But God is doing what is best for us, training us to live God’s holy best. At the time, discipline isn’t much fun. It always feels like it’s going against the grain. Later, of course, it pays off big-time, for it’s the well-trained who find themselves mature in their relationship with God.” Hebrews 12:4-11 MSG

… So that thing we’ve learned to love/hate, isn’t actually … tying our shoes … it’s Father God’s discipline! This scripture in Hebrews is food for thought. I really like the way the Message bible puts it … it is so clear and comforting. These verses reinforce that the difficult stuff that happens to us isn’t punishment – it’s training. Ya might want to sit and think about that thing that has been driving you batty. Maybe you are not being persecuted or driven nuts by someone else. Maybe it is part of growing up in God!

I can still remember teaching my children when they were little how to tie their shoes, over and over again. I know, nobody does that anymore because we all live in the land of velcro! But back in the ark, it was expected that by the time your little darling landed in kindergarten – he or she would have learnt how to tie their own shoes … as well as take themselves to the toilet. Shoe tying tried my patience heaps.

You know, sometimes I wish I could go back to those days for a do-over? It is a real shame how much easier it is to develop patience, and long-suffering, when you aren’t under pressure to run out of the door and deliver three kids to kindy or school. Especially if you are on foot.  Maybe one of your kids is a Dilly Daydream with their nose in a book, and they wouldn’t hurry if they were chased by a shark!

As I’ve gotten older, patience has become a bit more accessible to me. I’m much slower now, so I have had to learn to be patient with myself! Back then? Not-so-much. Sigh. I can remember recently talking with my now grown-up son many years later, discussing parenting styles. He was being very kind to me considering how little I knew about what I was doing back then!

A-n-y-way, my son laughingly made this remark about a question I asked him when I was fed up and he was younger and being naughty. I used to say: “Do you want a smack??” His comment was: “Honestly Mum, can you imagine any sane kid saying yes to that question??”… “Oh, yes please, Mum I’d love one!?” 😂 I’m so blessed that we’ve been able to laugh over the some of the stupid stuff I did and said. He has kids of his own so now there’s a lot of understanding between us. 

I just want to assure you if you have little kids at your house, hold on … they will grow like weeds and then one day sooner than you think, they will be gone. However, teaching them stuff they are going to need later on in life is extremely difficult, because not every kid is compliant … the little darlings. That means that parenting is not a whole lot of fun. Meanwhile, I am soooo totally over those ads with fake happy families in them. The idea that 4-5 people of various ages, are all outrageously happy at the same time, just because you fed them some fancy chicken, or pizza, is lunacy. Advertising is lying for profit!

Right now, I want to pause and just try to get my mind around how patient the Lord is with all of us. Some things in my life have come up over and over again, and I promise myself each time that I won’t do this or that … but then provocation happens, or it’s a bad day and I fail. I am so grateful to Him. I need to be reminded over and over again that the Holy Spirit is my teacher, and He is incredibly patient with me. He won’t withdraw His love and approval, ever. 

Some days I just can’t seem to get my heart and mind around the fact that trouble in my life is not punishment.

The Holy Spirit will not fail any of us … because He cannot fail. I’m praying I will stop fighting against His wise counsel because I know His discipline is good for me. Bye … 👋🏻