Married

P 3186 Here comes the Bride.

/ DVH

Sometimes I think that we are praying for the wrong thing! Let me explain: we can spend so much time praying for our spouses, our kids, our friends, etc. to change, when the person who needs to change is ME! It’s a waste of our time trying to pin our grumpy responses and attitudes on someone else – our responses are our responses! Aren’t you glad I said that out loud?  

I think we may need to be reminded that salvation is an ongoing process and none of us are there yet! However, that does not mean we should throw up our hands and give up on the process. The Lord’s processes are part of the ensuing transformation. In order to be His bride, we must participate and do things His way.

I read something that someone or other wrote about seeing a butterfly struggling to exit from its cocoon. They decided to help the poor little critter out, and carefully used a pen-knife to cut the hole a little larger. The butterfly emerged quickly and flapped its wings in the sun. The ‘helper’ was ecstatic – he had helped the little creature to evolve! Then the butterfly keeled over dead. The struggle to emerge was part of a very necessary strength it needed to fly. 

We are like that butterfly! There is only so much help we can get for ourselves from others — or even give to someone else that will actually help them. The struggle to emerge is part of the process and there are no shortcuts. We can and must pray for each other, but in the end we all need to make those wise choices to learn for ourselves. (Matthew 25:2) This process of learning what I must and must not do, is part of all of us realising that we can’t achieve a thing without the Holy Spirit’s help.

We can spend so much time focussing on what’s wrong with other people, or society, or our uncontrollable difficulties, that we forget that we too are more than capable of making huge mistakes. Our everyday contribution to this world counts. The point isn’t just about trying to avoid mistakes – the real point is it that it is ME that needs prayer! There are no perfect people here! It is my actions or lack of them, and sometimes my reactions, that need to be changed. 

We can waste our whole lives blaming other people for the things we’ve chosen to embrace, and we can even call it ‘protecting ourselves.’ But the reality is protecting me is His chosen job! “The LORD is my rock, my fortress, and my Saviour; my God is my rock, in Whom I find protection. He is my shield, the power that saves me, and my place of safety.”  Psalm 18:2. Why do I need to defend myself against you, if He is my protector? The best course of action for me in the middle of trouble is to run to Him. It’s called personal responsibility.

I desperately need to get that particular verse in Psalm 18, out of my head into my heart, quickly! Most of us   need our minds daily renewed in an ongoing fashion. And sadly, sometimes I treat the Lord like He is ‘other people.’ Most of my life, other people were not fun to be around. I suspect I’ve had that situation in common with practically everyone who has ever lived on this planet! 

However, deep down, know I’m not some helpless little hurt one, who needs to be petted and patted and soothed, The bible says I’m Jesus’ chosen Bride. Right here, right now. Grey hair and wrinkles and all!! Imagine the honour of that! He wants to marry each of us. In His eyes, we are His beloved forever — and that’s exactly how He thinks about us! 

We must not let ongoing difficulties and pain hobble us away from choosing to grow. We need the pioneering spirit that led our forefathers through hardship – instead of an attitude straight out of the pit, that says: “I can’t” ... when HE specifically says we can!  (Philippians 4:13) This life is not our fight, SomeBody already won for us, now we need to practice following the Lord through the hardships and sins that oppose us. 

The Lord is so good to us! In His eyes we are not some kind of pests who give in to weakness and use that idea as an excuse to avoid transformation. His focus is on our future together. He quite simply can’t wait to marry His Bride! Read Song of Solomon! And while you are in the book, take a look at Matthew 23:27.

“How often I have longed to gather your children together as a hen gathers her chicks under her wings, but you would have none of it!” Jesus, our Bridegroom, wants to protect us! Let’s not be like those who gave up before they reached the goal and they ‘would not!’ Let’s choose to believe what He has said about HIM and US. And daily we are learning, and waiting for our bridegroom to come through for us. Full of the Holy Spirit and love for Him. 

Let’s not bail out on change! We need to LIVE READY to embrace it when it comes..You know, Esther spent 6 months in all kinds of smelly stuff to get her ready for her one night with the King. And we have eternity to look forward to!

Brides start out as ordinary girls, and hopefully they are transformed into a bride through the love of the man they are marrying. Getting married is a process and we can’t skip the process because we know that our King is more than worthy of a beautiful Bride! The bible clearly tells us we are not to have a spot or wrinkle in our wedding garments, and our preparation is under the supervision of the Holy Spirit, Himself. I refuse to be afraid even though fear and his cohorts regularly bash on my door. I know I have a bigger purpose than marking time until I die and go to be with Him. 

Our wedding garment is a garment that has been dipped in His blood and it is spotless. The love of our Heavenly Bridegroom did all that for us! “He did this to present the church to Himself in splendour, without spot or wrinkle or anything like that, but holy and blameless.” Ephesians 5:27. We cannot dry-clean or wash ourselves – instead we need to live and act on the knowledge that the work has already been done for us – by SomeOne Who adores each and every one of us. 

Now we live this life, the only one we have, using our faith daily. Believing in Who He is, and What He says and what He has already done for us. We want to be ready for whatever comes our way, because we know we going to a wedding! Here comes His Bride and she’s no coward! Bye. 👋

P 2942 Obedience is a great healer.

/ DVH

Be-ca-use … as we are going off to do what He told us to do, He can heal us. I’m not just talking about ailments, although He loves to heal those too! I’m talking about the kind of troubles that say: “I’ve been alive a while and people-jumped-all-over-me-with-their-hobnail-boots-on … and hurt me badly..” So many Christians are sitting around with hurt feelings, waiting for God to heal them, so they can do something for the Lord. … Because their mother, father, spouse, kid – has been, or is still being – mean to them. Bin there dun that, the t-shirt was a dud!

We can’t change that behaviour … IT’S IN THE PAST. You can only have so much prayer that even with anointing oil you will slide down walls!! I’ve learnt, through His Grace, to leave the past behind me. Walk on. Like Jesus said,‘let the dead (past) bury the dead! NOW is the hour of salvation.”This is what ‘loving those people who despitefully use you‘is all about … putting the past where it belongs – behind you!

People have done dreadful things to each other, and their kids … Forgive, repent and … get over it. Jacob always had a limp. Some things mark you for life, but let it go and get on with your life. Don’t let someone else’s sin hold YOU hostage! And pray for the offenders, love on them, then … move on. Go out and be obedient to His heavenly vision. You don’t have to dig ditches to serve Jesus, your story may be a blessing to someone else.

I am not talking about neglecting our families or kids, or our family life – I’m talking about priorities. This world has subtly presented the idea that we cannot have fun without being whole. ROT! People had fun before they had electricity. I’m talking about living a godly life in front of your family as an example. Let your kids see that Christians value God’s opinion more than their own, and they value obedience.   

Many loving, fantastic parents put their lives on standby, while their most productive years are being devoted to raising their children, and contributing to the kid’s well-being. Protecting and helping your kids can become a habit that is hard to break — even when the little darlings are turning 55 soon! That person we fuss over is a grown up, by the way. The best way to learn about this life is to live it!

We have carefully cultivated a million reasons why we can’t be involved in that banquet the Lord talked about in Matthew 22:1–14 and Luke 14:15–24… ’I got married. I bought a field. I’m just too busy!’  That banquet story is not just about heaven, it is about here and now. Do yourself a favour, don’t ever be too busy to be obedient to the Lord! That is a slippery slide that leads right out of the building.

Many bits of my body either don’t work, or constantly complain at me, it would be easy to sit in a corner and wait to die. Somebody I love is doing that with their life, even as I am writing this blog. It’s sad. We have no control over the time of our own departure – unless we make a dumb decision to take the matter into our own hands! Our time is in HIS hands. I’m not trying to criticise others for their choices, but that’s not what I call a LIFE.

Hubby and I always have so much fun together on the road, but his back is often pretty dreadful. Sometimes he can’t hear or see as well as he used to, and now his memory falls out on him like money slips out of a purse with a hole in it! I used to rely on his memory, mainly because I can’t remember what I said 5 minutes ago – and the harder I try to locate it, the less successful I am. Hubby is a bit younger than I am. He is younger by … …mind your own business … so now we both have to rely upon God to remind us, because we are both terrible at it.

We go on the road and we drive thousands of kilometres simply to obey God. The Lord has sent us to care for the people that He knows are waiting for someone to come and help them understand what He is all about! Acts 8:26-4O. There are times the people we meet don’t know what they don’t know, until hubby talks to them. Then they cry all over the place.

We spoke to 51 specific people this time – we don’t do thousands! We are just posties for Jesus, on the road bringing others the mail/message He wants them to have. You don’t have to be an evangelist to witness to God’s goodness. And we’ve proved that don’t have to be well either! Everybody likes to go on holidays, just take blankets and bibles with you. Find a homeless shelter or a women’s shelter – sadly there are plenty of those. 

We can waste our God-given time claiming we’re waiting for God to heal us, or for a sign from heaven. Here’s an interesting scripture to chew on about signs …“But He (Jesus)replied to them, “An evil and adulterous generation craves a sign.”Matthew 12:30. We can make excuses and not obey Him, OR we can limp, hop, crawl out there back into this world and just love on people, and see where that leads us. There really are better things than healing – and obedience is a great Healer. Bye. 👋

PS I’d rather wear out than rust out!

P 2656 Let’s remember we are to be married.🕊

/ DVH

Romans 7:4-6 MSG: “So, my friends, this is something like what has taken place with you. When Christ died He took that entire rule-dominated way of life down with Him and left it in the tomb, leaving you free to “marry” a resurrection life and bear “offspring” of faith for God. For as long as we lived that old way of life, doing whatever we felt we could get away with, sin was calling most of the shots as the old law code hemmed us in. And this made us all the more rebellious. In the end, all we had to show for it was miscarriages and stillbirths. But now that we’re no longer shackled to that domineering mate of sin, and out from under all those oppressive regulations and fine print, we’re free to live a new life in the freedom of God.”

Oh man, some days I can’t wait to get to heaven to listen to the Apostle Paul preaching  – that’s if I ever get over following Jesus around! What a conundrum … Picture this: Jesus is talking about how He and the Holy Spirit made the moon and stars, as He heard the Father speaking them into being. At the same time, Paul is talking about the beauty of Christ Jesus;  and James is reminding us of what we’ve been given … OR …OR!!! … every now and then we fall on our faces from the sheer wonder of where we are! And… AND!!! Here’s the biggest plus of all! We can run into the throne room and fall on our faces and worship at the throne. Choices, choices!  Maybe in heaven we can do all those things at once?! Sorry I got so distracted … moving on …

Romans 8:1-4 MSG: “With the arrival of Jesus, the Messiah, that fateful dilemma is resolved. Those who enter into Christ’s being-here-for-us no longer have to live under a continuous, low-lying black cloud. A new power is in operation. The Spirit of life in Christ, like a strong wind, has magnificently cleared the air, freeing you from a fated lifetime of brutal tyranny at the hands of sin and death. God went for the jugular when He sent His own Son. He didn’t deal with the problem as something remote and unimportant. In His Son, Jesus, He personally took on the human condition, entered the disordered mess of struggling humanity in order to set it right once and for all.”

Feel free to stand on a chair and cheer! 🥳 What a brilliant explanation! First of all I want to say, there is no worship and devotion toward the Father, Son and the Holy Spirit like the worship we choose to give All of Them down here. Why? Because down here worship is a choice, a sacrifice – in heaven, worship is joyously spontaneous. We give the Trinity the best gift when we choose to worship Them, because They are so worthy. Despite our busy lives, or whether we feel like it or not!

Just imagine the throne room for a second … there are these incredible angels — flying around the throne crying out; “Holy holy holy” over and over and over and over again – they never stop. I asked the Holy Spirit once why they do that and He told me this: ‘Because at every single turn they see something new, something glorious to enjoy, some aspect of the Father’s Love and Grace they have never seen before.” 🤯 Well, that’s my mind blown… how about you? Down here, we are always running after whatever is new – in heaven we simply have to gaze at our Heavenly Father and the view will be breath-taking and endless.

I shall vacate this heavenly rabbit trail and get back to my point … which is … look at what our beloved Bridegroom has done for us!  Take a minute to wander back to Romans 8:1-4 and read those verses again. Just when you think things can’t get any bigger or even more wonderful, we are reminded that our precious bridegroom, Jesus Christ, volunteered … because He loves us that much. Well, there’s me in a soggy heap in the corner. 😭

Christians can live like everyone else, staring at the ground, thinking that the next episode of our fav show is the only moment of joy in a week of drudgery and effort — OR — we can reread Romans and rediscover what we have been GIVEN. Those verses mean that we have the power to throw off depression and the cares of this world, because of our Bridegroom’s gifts. Those freely-given gifts mean we can be at rest, care-free, living in pure peace, despite our circumstances and difficulties.

JESUS HAS GOT US AND HE WILL NEVER EVER LEAVE US OR FORSAKE US. How we feel is just a blip on time’s radar. We don’t have to live under this world’s clouds of pessimism, constant drama and angst. Instead we can choose to embrace what we’ve been given. Each and every time I take hold of those hard-won gifts that He died to give me, I fall in love with Him over and over again.

Real Love is like that. It is a journey of discovery, familiarity …  as well as delight, where we visit and re-visit the Lord’s loving kindness, mercy and grace, and realise how much He loves us.  It’s time to remember we are engaged to be married to the most incredible Bridegroom … Who loved us before we even knew Him! Our faith is not based on pretty thoughts or theories, now we live in the daily reality of being totally forgiven, loved and cherished … And if we aren’t living there, then it is time we did!  Bye. 🙌

P 2624 Take positive action.

/ DVH

“Do not waste time bothering whether you “love” your neighbour; act as if you did. As soon as we do this we find one of the great secrets. When you are behaving as if you loved someone you will presently come to love him.” (CS Lewis.)

God said that like this, in Colossians 3:2-10: “Set your minds on things that are above …(!!!That’s where the real action is!) “… not on things that are on earth. For you have died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God. When Christ Who is your life appears, then you also will appear with Him in glory. Put to death therefore what is earthly in you: sexual immorality, impurity, passion, evil desire, and covetousness, which is idolatry. On account of these the wrath of God is coming.

In these you too once walked, when you were living in them. But now you must put them all away: anger, wrath, malice, slander, and obscene talk from your mouth. Do not lie to one another, seeing that you have put off the old self with its practices and have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge after the image of its Creator….”

… “  (12-14) “Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony.”

So here’s my question — WHO gets all this nifty, but really nitty, gritty, hard stuff? We do! You. Me. US! This means I can’t sit about on my hands praying fervently that the Lord will change me … while I keep on doing the stuff the bible says DON’T DO! This is a really good time to remember that the Lord put Jonah in a whale (!!) to get him back on track. So if you wanna be rebellious, then you’d better stay away from SeaWorld!

Seriously, this stuff is a no-brainer. We need to take what Jesus said and make it our great AIM to leave the ugly stuff that will tangle us up and make us fall over, behind us. If you are a fighting person who gets bad tempered at the drop of a hat, then whack your hand over your mouth and vacate the premises. And don’t come back until the urge has left you! Our mouths get us in so much trouble – sadly, I have learnt this truth the hard way. What we say, or sometimes refuse to say … is responsible for so many bad things. If we choose to abuse someone else it will escalate – and unless you are talking to a door, then that other person will retaliate!

No-one wins in an argument. Even if you think you’ve won you’ve lost! When we bad mouth or abuse someone else, we are deliberately walking away from the Lord and empowering the Old Self. Jesus won’t interfere, He wants us to take responsibility for our own behaviour. Honestly, I don’t care what they said — what am I going to do about it? We must stop expecting the Lord to supernaturally intervene, and work on changing our own hearts. HE WILL HELP US but He will not do it for us! Nothing else matters but being with Him.  So put away the things that are going to drag us away from loving Him, worshipping Him, following Him. We cannot serve two Masters. Jesus said that in Matthew 6:24. 

For those of you who are related or married to somebody who loves to pick fights, or someone who gets irritable easily … stop blaming them, and quit engaging with the argument. I don’t care how wrong they are – what is the kingdom of God worth to you? Sadly, for some people it is worth less than their own opinion. We want all the power in the world so we can move mountains, but we cannot deal with the mountains of disapproval, criticism and lust in our own lives? Good luck moving that other mountain Jesus spoke about, if you can’t control YOU.

Start speaking love and approval to the other person. It is extremely hard to argue with someone else who keeps telling you how terrific you are, how valuable you are. It is not lying – that person is valuable to God! When we are angry with someone, we rehearse their faults – why not rehearse their good points?! Life is not a competition, it is not about who wins or loses. It is about life and death. Yours, theirs and the people around us. We’ve been put here to shine His light into a dark place —- not to increase the darkness! Lastly, revenge belongs to the Lord, so do yourself a favour and don’t get in His Way.

Jesus said this verse nobody likes, remember? (Matthew 5:29)“And if thy right eye offend thee, pluck it out, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for. thee that one of thy members should perish, and. not that thy whole body should be cast into hell.” Imagine what we would all LOOK LIKE if we took that verse seriously! 😱 We need to choose to participate in positive actions with His help. Lastly, “Love your enemies …” — because at the very least you will drive them crazy!

Bye. 👋

P 2398 To really live, we must die.

/ DVH

Absolutely everything depends on how seriously you and I take what Jesus said! “For whoever wishes to save his life [in this world] will [eventually] lose it [through death], but whoever loses his life [in this world] for My sake and the gospel’s will save it [from the consequences of sin and separation from God].” Mark 8:35 AMP.

Salvation is not just a one time event, where you make a decision to become a Christian and that’s that. At the time of that commitment, we might cry a little … or a lot, depending on our response … but this moment is the beginning of our understanding of what Christ did for us all. After this moment then we need to begin to fix the broken relationships we have. Plus we start to pray about tithing, and regularly attending church. Maybe we also go to prayer groups or bible studies. These are difficult but still attainable life-changing things. Sadly many Christians stop right there. 

However, salvation is a PROCESS – not just an event. That process involves the transformation of our lives and it takes a lifetime to bring it about. As we enter into it and God teaches us His ways — we will be changed. We won’t pray, walk, talk, think, or speak the way we did before. Not because of rules or traditions, but because the bible itself changes us. This is when we start to understand that our old nature was taken to the cross when Christ went there – we deliberately choose His ways. Now we want to live the way He did, for God’s glory. Jesus Christ came to earth to die for humanity’s sins, and He also left us an incredible legacy.  A new way to live.

Hubby and I have been married for 35 years. Knowing him has changed me heaps. I laugh more than I used to, despite the difficulties we face daily. It is not that he is hilariously funny … sometimes he tells the worst jokes(!!!) … but in spite of that, his humour evokes a happy response from me. Knowing him and how he thinks, has changed the way I view this life. You could say his life has influenced mine.

Some things that I used to panic over, I have learnt to dismiss or leave alone. Hubby has taught me something no-one else ever taught me … it is possible to stay in love with one person for the rest of your life. However, always liking them … meh! Some days that’s a whole other story. 🙄 But ongoing, fully-committed love is actually possible from a human POV, if each person is prepared to die-to-self in the process. Forget the whole “Oh that’s just me, I’m just like that” rubbish – marriage is about two people becoming ONE. Adjustment will be required.

Now, if another person who is like us can teach us such important stuff – then imagine what the Lord God Maker of heaven and earth can teach us as we get to know HIM. This is the real point of salvation – it is about getting to know SomeOne … and as a result we can progressively learn to rely upon Jesus in all kinds of circumstances. This is how He has taught me, personally and authentically, how wonderful He is. I experience Him, His thoughts, His ways, as I interact with Him in my prayer time, and by reading the bible, and when we obey Him. 

However, if I limit my interactions with Him, and live my Christian life spasmodically, in and out of what His Word says … I will end up with a limited view. He won’t quit on me, but I am distancing myself from Him. That’s when our relationship will become stunted and stiff and lack spiritual life. By engaging in this growth process, I have become aware that this relationship can be costly. I have had to give up my ideas and attitudes about this world and the people in it. Here’s a couple of examples:  before I met the Lord, I saw some people as enemies – but Jesus sees potential for a loving relationship. At other times when I am afraid, and try to hide or run away, He stands with me as I face whatever it is. He helps me conquer my fears. 

Father God’s view of love can seem upside down to what human beings think. Eve thought – “its just a bit of fruit and it looks OK – here you try it  Adam!” She thought her own wisdom was enough. King Saul thought looks and presence would put him over, as a king. But God wanted a man who trusted in Him, not appearances. Solomon thought that many wives meant He was a very important king. He ended up going the wrong way after those wives influenced him. Goliath thought being bigger, stronger and overbearing would give him victory. So God sent a kid to kill him with a round stone.

When we shrink God’s ways into a shape that suits US, we are making a god after our own image. Jesus Christ came to show us that He could live life as a human being like us and still have and maintain a God-obedient love-filled life. We simply need to continually study and obey God’s Word under His guidance, and let it change our minds and reactions. Then He will make that word alive inside us. This means to really live – we will have to choose to die. 👋🏻

“His divine power has given us everything we need for a godly life through our knowledge of Him who called us by His own glory and goodness.” 2 Peter 1:3 NIV