life-skill

P 2679 Stress – the peace devourer.

/ DVH

This is the dictionary’s interpretation of the word – STRESS: great worry caused by a difficult situation. People under a lot of stress may experience headaches, minor pains, and sleeping problems  As if life isn’t difficult enough!

Here are some of my own thoughts about combating stress. I believe exercise can help. Repetitive gentle stretching and moderate exercise gives my brain more oxygen to work with! Plus I use intentional breathing. I quiet my emotions and thoughts by simply concentrating on my breathing. And a few good night’s sleep in a row can help! Also do something fun to break the cycle of “I’ve gotta be, gotta do, gotta go, gotta help …” Instead prioritise helping yourself to get rid of the stress. Stressful people ain’t fun to be around!!

I think parents often find themselves striving to keep their kids lives on an even keel. When kids are on edge so is everyone else! My advice is to let them practice fixing their own problems, instead of adding their problems into your list! I do this all the time. 🙄 Older kids need to be given opportunities to resolve conflict and trouble for themselves – it’s a much needed life-skill. I’d encourage them to ask the Lord to help, but I would also pray for them. The thing is, we often problem solve things for our kids because if they are stressed then they over-stress us and … round and round we go! Pray God will help them and step away. If they are too young to think things through, then present them with two alternative answers to their barrage of questions – tell them the answer is this OR that.

Laughter and humour are great stress breakers. But if you are dealing with another person I recommend that you explain you are not laughing AT them – otherwise war may break out! Watch something you like on TV, that is not stressful. I use Youtube a lot. I put on some Tim Janis or Dappy T Keys and I just listen and watch the pictures! That stuff is like peace on a stick. It’s incredibly peaceful. Or you can listen to music that you like. Sit and read a book and zone out. If you are going to read the bible then read your favourite Psalms. Just don’t read great big swatches of it – it is better to soak, not study. Just read a couple of verses that show you how much God loves you, and regularly pause while reading, to let it sink in. 

People often behave irrationally when they are under stress – it is not intentional – stress has a way of sneaking up on all of us. The thing is, if you are stressed then it is more than likely the rest of your family will pick up on it and they will eventually join in! I believe stress is the cause of more disagreements and strife in our everyday lives than we actually realise. You can’t think your way out of it – because over-thinking got you into it!  FYI, none of us have the ability to solve a whole lot of problems all at once! Just saying …

Stress can tip over into worry when we are unaware of it. The mind winds up and shoots off in a number of directions trying to solve every problem in our universe  – then, quite naturally, our mind objects to being overtaxed because we are not made to deal with a whole lot of problems all at once! I recommend prioritising. Make lists if it helps but remember to cross things off the list once you have accomplished them. Human beings need the feeling of winning, of gaining ground, to help us keep on moving forward. So do celebrate your successes – do it on purpose!

There have been times in my life when I have forgotten what I was stressed about, (good thing!) but then I drove myself nuts trying to remember what I forgot. (Bad thing!!)  At the same time, I have been known to annoy people in my near vicinity with my somewhat over-emphasised problem-solving attempts on their behalf. A problem-solving person may not be what a stressed person needs! I found that out the hard way. Suggestions can just muddy the waters and frustrate everyone.

I have left the best until last. God does not want us to live this life like a frayed end. Please don’t leave the Lord out. He wants IN. He wants to show Himself strong and active on our behalf. I have often made the mistake of thinking that the best way for God to help me, is for Him to solve all my problems. Wrong! God is not our personal problem solver any more than He is our personal trainer! His aim is for us to get through the difficulties holding onto His hand, totally at peace and releasing that peace into the atmosphere around us.

John 14:27 says:“Peace I leave with you; My peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.” How do we enter this peace? There’s this groovy little word called “let,” it means “allow.” When we find ourselves buzzing about like a bumble bee trapped by a window, it is time to realise that we have let ourselves be overwhelmed by the circumstances. Time to stop and pray about letting things go and handing them over to Him. See all the above suggestions … I told you I like to make them!! 😊 Lastly, fix the things you can with His help, but relinquish the ones you can’t. Bye. 👋

P 2556 Take the time to be observant.

/ DVH

Reflecting on this life and it’s activities is almost an automatic past-time as you get older. You can even end up zoning out … and sometimes you might just plain fall asleep in the process! This seems to happen fairly regularly when there is more of your life behind you than there is in front! 😂 However… taking the time to be observant is an enormously overlooked life-skill. 

Humanity is always busy. This life is about hurry hurry, rush rush, everywhere — gotta be, gotta do, gotta make money, gotta buy stuff! Gotta help this guy … gotta yell at that one! If we sit down at all,  it’s because we simply have to veg-out and stop thinking, purely because we are exhausted – mentally, and physically. I believe we will build our own faith if we take the time to notice the beautiful things God does for us every single day, plus the incredibly lovely things He has put all around us.

Here’s a verse to chew on: “Wait and listen, everyone who is thirsty! Come to the waters; and he who has no money, come, buy and eat! Yes, come, buy [priceless, spiritual] wine and milk without money and without price [simply for the self-surrender that accepts the blessing].” Amp. Isaiah 55:1-3. Maybe, if we have stopped being thirsty, it’s because we are trying to satisfy spiritual needs with physical activity and busyness etc? Trust me, that won’t work. If you feel like you are working yourself to the bone but you are going nowhere, this could easily be the reason. Perhaps you’ve lost the power to observe and reflect.

True rest, joy and peace only comes from Jesus. From knowing Him. From seeing this life from His POV. I believe that is why Christ said: “… consider the lilies” AND  “… consider the birds.”  Mankind can get so busy providing, buying, doing and planning, we can easily forget this life is not all there is! Walking with Jesus down here on earth is preparation for walking with Him up there in heaven. How do I know that? Because the bible says: “…on earth as it is in heaven.” There ain’t nobody rushing about in heaven! There is no need, time as we know it, doesn’t exist up there.

Being reflectively observant means we take some moments to actually pay a different kind of attention to the world around us. We aren’t racing along so task-focussed we have no thought for anything else.  My favourite thing to look at when I am just chilling, is birds. It seemed to me, when I prayed over this, that birds have another lesson to teach me. To start with Jesus told us to consider them – so that kind of makes it legal! 

Did you ever wonder why Jesus mentioned flowers and birds as good illustrations of the way we are to regard His kingdom? As I’ve said I watch birds a lot. It seems to me that the only time they are not busy is when they are sleeping! However,…birds never actually ASK where their food comes from. Aha!— thinks I… so perhaps this bible thought is about not busyness but what actually occupies or fills our minds. Like the stuff we think about as we go about our days? Maybe birds are simply occupied “…with the self-surrender that accepts the blessing.“ 

Have WE learnt the self-surrender that accepts the daily blessings that God sends us? We know He does bless us all the time because He is a far better Father than our earthly fathers ever could be! (Matthew 7:9-11.) But can it be that we are so busy rushing here and there and everywhere, that we don’t notice, or even pause and see what He is doing? I believe in the power of pausing. The bible calls that “selah” – it means pause and think on this.

So I’ve asked the Lord to help me to stop, and pay attention to whatever He is doing, plus what is going on around me. I am learning to take the time, moment by moment, to notice and thank Him for doing it. Our steps are ordered by Him. (Psalm 37: 23,24.) That means there is not one fraction of a second in your life and mine that is not considered, gazed upon, and lovingly reflected upon, by God Himself. Just that thought should blow anyone’s mind into reflection! Yet another great way to know our Heavenly Father is to see this life through His eyes, and He is never in a hurry.

It is amazing that there are things that we can miss from day to day, unless we are prompted by the Holy Spirit. However, He is not a TADA! kind of a Person. But He will bring these things to our attention if we ask Him to, so we can carefully observe and reflect on them. Bye. 😊👋

Proverbs 4:20-22“My son, give attention to my words; Incline your ear to my sayings. Do not let them depart from your eyes; Keep them in the midst of your heart; For they are life to those who find them, And health to all their flesh.”