P 3079 Stuck!

“Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead,…” Philippians 3:14.

“Anyone who listens to the word but does not do what it says is like someone who looks at his face in a mirror and, after looking at himself, goes away and immediately forgets what he looks like.” James 1:23-24.                                                        

“I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.“ Philippians 3:14. 

It’s not the falling over that gets you – it’s all the effort it takes to get up again! But these verses offer us some great comforting advice and we should take it. Our lives have been redesigned so that now we can both live forgetting the past and pressing in toward our future in Christ. This means that if I want my past left behind, then I should leave your past offences toward me behind too. I guess that is why the writer used the word STRAINING! 

Choosing to become forgetful of the past is one of the biggest assignments of our faith. My problem can be a lie the devil chucks at me … It feels like, if I forget what you did to me then I am letting you off the hook. You can go and do the same thing, or even worse, to me next time! At the bottom of our lack of forgetfulness toward people who have really hurt us, is a lack of trust. I don’t trust you because I think you have given me good reasons not to trust you. I probably don’t even trust the Lord to deal with you – and ps I actually think He should take you off to the woodshed and give you a good whopping!

Let’s look at the situation this way: The above verses are part of a process, they are not the end game. The end game is …press on!  But to do that, we will need to be actively engaged in forgetting what is past. At the same time I will need to remember and face what I actually look like, because I can get so used to highlighting your faults that most of the time, I can’t see mine! In my mind your faults make mine look tiny. That kind of blindness is part of a defence system.

The reality is that I want to stay mad at you, because you did something so terrible I can’t let you be close to me again because I cannot bear the hurt again. That hurt may manifest itself in anger, like I said yesterday, because someone has punctured my little smiley-face balloon persona, and now I’ve found out that I am not the nice person I thought I was.  My real sin is not just unforgiveness, it is that my flesh is in charge, not my spirit, and this other person has forced me to face myself. 

I can kid myself that I am a nice person, especially if everyone around me plays fair, and no-one pokes the bear inside me. But when someone pokes that bear, suddenly I know that I truly need saving. Yet I still have a place I can hide in, because I can tell myself that I am not that bad. YOU made me look that bad because you did thus and thus and made life difficult for me.

Because of this almost unconscious process, I can exonerate myself from my own personal responsibility and I pass all the responsibility for my actions over to you. That is just so dumb on so many levels! One of them is that I already don’t like you, and yet I’m putting you in charge of my behaviour. The bible clearly tells me what I look like at that moment, because my focus is on you, it clouds my view of myself in His mirror, and I then I walk away SMUG. Sadly, I can also dirty up the mirror of God’s word with religion and good works.

But spiritually I am stuck. This following story is an illustration of what stuck can look like. I have been to Anne Hathaway’s house in England. ‘Shakespeare country.’ In the houses back then, there were solid beams going from the roof to the floor, and the floor consisted of stone paving. At the bottom of one such beam I noticed a deep groove. I asked the guide what it was, and they told me it was a post-middle ages’ method of keeping a tiny tot safe. 

The parent would strap the child into a leather harness and the kid walked round and round the beam. The beam was not all that big, so the kid must have been bored out of its gourd going round and round! These things were commonly used in those times. It’s a wonder kids didn’t turn out to be a little doolally … temporarily deranged and/or feeble minded! They were totally stuck there – all in the name of safety!

Let’s take a look at how to move forward from being stuck. I need to actively choose to forget the old and press forward toward the new. There is a new place for you and I to occupy together, it is a place where hopefully, both of us let go of the past, and begin to look toward a new and different relationship. We have given up trying to make the old one that we had work, because it didn’t.  It is foolish to keep repeating old behaviour patterns, when they just lead us into the same old holes. And so now we choose to start again to rebuild trust between us.

We can use the Word of God as our guide, instead of our past experiences, or even our personal needs. As we look into His Word, we will discover that both of us have faults that have affected our ability to relate to each other in a Godly fashion. Instead we have chosen to look into His Word deliberately, to find places we both need transformation! That’s what pressing on looks like. We move beyond being stuck in our fleshly desires and wants, and press forward into doing what He wants. Bye. 👋

P 2631 Beware of roadblocks.

There is a possibility in our lives that we can have hidden, (even from ourselves), agendas – things that will inadvertently get in the way of true growth. Sometimes we can get caught up in our minds or emotions with ideas, people or things that we fiercely defend, but we are totally unaware that is what we are doing. Over a longer period of time, we can also learn to carefully avoid some situations because we are subconsciously aware that we don’t cope with them. Likewise, we can steer away from, or even get angry about, some things, purely because there is concealed pain behind them.

Ask yourself this question – apart from Jesus Himself – Who is THE most important person in your life – is there anyone or anything that you strongly feel that you cannot live without? Maybe a person who you value so much, that even the smallest thought of loss can send you into fear or anxiety? If you are a parent, maybe it’s a child …whether it is an adult child or not …  or perhaps a spouse;  or a close friend. Even the thought of any loss connected with these things can send you into an overwhelming downward spiral. If even the very thought of letting go of something or someone sends us into a panic – that is a clear indication something has grabbed hold of us!

You know, the thing we are most afraid of, can sometimes be the greatest spiritual strength in our lives, when we overcome that fear with His help. Always remembering that His help leads us TO DO SOMETHING. Perhaps there is a job we don’t want to lose, or we’ve fixated on finding somewhere safe to live – but this thing, whatever it is, influences every other decision we make. And it may not even consciously register in our minds. In this scenario that person or thing, no matter how normal or insignificant they seem to be, can become a roadblock to spiritual growth. 

When things get tough, and hardship strikes — this predisposition to protect ourselves and hide from suffering, will get in the way of any of the Holy Spirit’s solutions. Simply put, we won’t ask Him to help us with someone or something we don’t want to lose … just in case He takes that thing or person away! Plus we can easily go on from there to make decisions based on fear and pain instead of what the Lord wants. 

It is incredibly easy to think we know what is best for us – but that decision can be formed within the framework of hidden fear NOT FAITH. The assumption that our feelings, or even familiar thought patterns are a good guide, is a lie! The Word of God is our primary, solitary guide. I have seen godly parents put up with abuse, because they feel they cannot live without their fully grown child and the sneaky wrong spirit in that adult child ends up ruling the roost.

Or maybe the parent is afraid of what will become of their progeny and sadly, co-dependency has taken hold. We can sometimes desperately pray and hope: “that Jesus won’t mind, because He understands I can’t help it, I need it to be like this.” Read the gospels … the Lord told one man to leave his recently deceased father behind!

I have also seen sweet Godly Christians hurt others because they refuse to let go of something that should have been left behind them years ago. That has been caused by fear which has been carried forward from childhood pain. It can colour our adult thinking. The thing to do in such situations is to get to the root of the tree by asking WHY?

Why do I feel so strongly that I cannot let go of my child, or spouse etc. and give them to Jesus unreservedly, without any agenda in my heart? What pattern of ungodly thinking is preventing my growth? What fear is ruling my life? How did it start, and what am I still doing now, today, to keep that fear alive? We need to prayerfully identify and deal with these issues under the Holy Spirit’s wisdom and guidance.

Our God is not mean. He is a loving caring Father, who is deeply involved, and intimately engaged in our everyday lives. BTW, this issue is not about disobedience, it is a deep lack of trust. We are not trusting the Lord to take care of those things that are extremely important to us. Sadly we could even be letting fear rule. But our precious loving Father knows us, and He knows the way we need to go to get through things like this. We must follow Him, step by step into relinquishment. It is not good to hold on to other people so tightly that you lose your own God-given freedom!

Matthew 16:19:“I will give you the keys of the kingdom of heaven; whatever you bind on earth will be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth will be loosed in heaven.” The Lord Jesus Christ gave His power to the disciples when they were too dumb to know what they were given. That’s how generous to mankind He has been! We can personally prevent any change in difficult situations or even dangerous ones by misusing the power we already have — instead of yielding people or material things to Him and progressively learning to live a life of faith. We need to let go of those things that weigh us down. At the same time by holding on too tightly to someone/something else we have the power to prevent growth and change in that other person or situation.

It is part of our job description to voluntarily choose to live this new life Jesus died to give us, embracing the power to overcome, instead of hiding away from it because it might pinch something from us! Plus always watching and aware of any roadblocks or ‘keep-out signs’ we have inadvertently put up or embraced… because we know those things will steal His new life away from us. Bye. 👋