Interpersonal | firstfloormessages.com

I must say I am not sure how this new system of being a specific age before you use social media, is going to work out overall. I think it is a great idea. But good luck reinforcing something when your teenage kids are expert at using your logic against you. What is wrong with a parent saying: “No?” Or, “It’s dinner time put your phone down please!?” Or… “We are having a no-phone day today and that includes parents!” It seems to me that parents are now scared of their kids and there is something seriously wrong with that! (Read 2 Timothy 3:2)

In my opinion, children need to learn to self-regulate, and parents don’t always have the time to be nice about it. One of mine ran on the road when they were little, I did not make a suggestion or give an alternative response!I screamed: “Danger!” And ran after them. We are not raising totally autonomous little beings – our children live in a world with other people – and they need to learn to act accordingly. This world is not there to contribute to them, they are here to contribute to it! One of mine bit someone else’s kid when they were little…but they only did it once!

I did some homework in this subject and found that “no’ is a bad word to use when you are parenting. Blimey… ! I’m glad I’m not parenting a child now! I told mine when they were angry with me for disciplining them: “I’m your parent, not your friend, now go and do what I say.” I can understand the fear of being reported – going to jail for smacking your kid will do that to you. Crazy stuff! It seems Big Brother is watching, and Big Brother ain’t all that wise!!

However, I subscribe to what the bible says — back in the Ark it worked for me! Proverbs has lots of useful teaching kids info in it. “Train up a child in the way he should go [teaching him to seek God’s wisdom and will for his abilities and talents], Even when he is old he will not depart from it.” Proverbs 22:6. “Whoever spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is diligent to discipline him.” Proverbs 13:24. Now there’s a shocker, and here’s another one! “Folly is bound up in the heart of a child, but the rod of discipline drives it far from him.” Proverbs 22:15.

I wonder what today’s world would make out of Abraham tying up Isaac and plopping him on an altar, all ready to kill him? Abe’s only lame-o excuse was: “God told me to do it!?” Or what about Hannah dropping off her little boy at the local synagogue at the age of three or four and leaving him there? Now there’s a new kind of all day-every day daycare!

There are loads of scriptures like the three I put above – but I’m pretty sure in today’s world we choose to ignore them. Because …we know better than God nowadays … He’s old fashioned…apparently! How does that go again?? How well is this tolerant attitude working on those teenagers pinching other people’s cars, beating up elderly people, and running around carrying machetes? Let’s think this idea through for a bit. If our children learn “no”when they are little, they will eventually learn how to discipline themselves. Or perhaps they will end up in grown up jail, because we’d rather look good!

I know that there are some kids who will disobey just to test the boundaries. I had some of those. Have we forgotten that boundaries represent security? Kids need security! We must always pray about stuff, but we need to teach our kids Godly boundaries too. The bible is an action book – not a book full of theories. God’s book has loads of practical daily applications. But one of the ways you can teach your kids is to set a good example.

It’s no use talking about not stealing if you continue to cheat on your income tax. Or maybe you don’t take back money that is not yours when the check-out chick gives you the wrong change! Telling them not to squabble will have a short shelf-life if you and your spouse regularly have word fights as a love language! What you watch on TV is another way to witness to them. I used to tell mine: “Jesus wouldn’t watch that, its demonstrating how to do stuff we don’t do, because we follow Him.” The Lord disciplines us for our own good – love doesn’t always say ‘yes.’

On the positive side: my hubby, (grandpa), takes any or all of our grandkids out with him, when he is visiting the neighbours to bless them with a gift, or helping them out. Our grandson, who is 15, asks a bazillion questions afterward. It has opened up all kinds of conversations. Faith is not just a Sunday event, it’s a lifestyle. And yes, I have had more than one of my own kids reject that lifestyle … but praise Him that the Word of God eventually prevailed and now they have their own faith – without any pressure from me. Now my kids teach ME stuff. Boy, that was a hard nut to swallow initially, but I’m the better for it. They help to keep me honest about what I believe.

My last thought on this subject is this: our world today is totally happy to accept the premise that we don’t have to respect other people. ‘I will only respect you if you have earned it.” Hooey! The people who say that guff don’t respect or acknowledge Almighty God – so why are we following them? That’s backwards! I know I’m old-fashioned, but respecting other human beings is essential. It facilitates relationships. A lack of interpersonal respect promotes anarchy. The whole idea that I’m the only person who can decide whether things are good or bad is terrifying.

I wonder — how are you parenting your kids as you follow Him? Bye. 👋

I have recently come to the conclusion our society is no longer living our lives in a holistic, interactive, interpersonal way anymore. We seem to see sex as the same thing as intimacy, and we have contented ourselves with living this life voyeuristically. What I mean is people are watching other people live their fictional lives on TV or social media pages.

Even if most of what is read is exaggerated or photoshopped – and whether it is true OR NOT — it is, unfortunately, way too easy to live our lives like peeping toms peeking through life’s windows, and occasionally making clever comments. That’s a very poor use of a beautiful God-given gift – insight. People can get so busy trying to impress each other, that they aren’t living the life they actually have, … enjoying the days God has given us, plus interacting with the people who live around us.

Many years ago, hubby and I were blessed to travel to many other parts of this world. I became so obsessed with taking photos for our memories back home, that in the end … I was looking at all that glorious once-in-a-lifetime scenery through a view finder. The Lord whispered to my heart: “Look UP. You are really here. Enjoy the sun on your face, enjoy the people around you. Enjoy the atmosphere. You can’t live your life through a view finder!” Hilariously, that whole thing had a fascinating ending … we hardly ever looked at those photos when we got home!

You and I only have now … even the next minute may not be ours. All over this world human beings have died while I am taking the time to type this. Humanity seems to have become quite shallow parodies of who we can really be. Only standing up to demand things, and complain about what we want. We protest, instead of finding ways to contribute! We were made for finer things.

But although we can now plumb the depths of our oceans with clever, specially made vehicles, we can’t plumb the depths of our own souls! Apparently hurting people aren’t very interesting or popular — so most of us have learnt to hide what is really happening inside, where we actually live — because we need to present a successful happy face to the world around us. We’ve stopped participating and now we live our lives spectating. The only thing that can tempt us to participate is MORE MONEY.

This faith life we have been given is to be lived, enjoyed, savoured – not dissected or commented upon. As Christians we will miss the best bits if we don’t appreciate what we have right now. It is in front of us. We all need to turn off our critical responses and start looking for what is good about things and how can I help? I don’t need to be famous to help, I just need to get off my butt and do something.

There are times when we spend our precious time discussing other people and their faults, and pulling them apart with words. If we are clever enough we can make you laugh, and feel bad, all at the same time!! We dissect other people like frogs in a laboratory … but our spiritual eyes are so blind that we cannot see that other people have pain that is beyond their words, and outward appearances. Thank God for our Saviour Who sees beyond our posturing and pretence, right into our hearts. …“Then we cried out, “Lord, help us! Rescue us!” And He did! His light broke through the darkness and He led us out in freedom from death’s dark shadow and snapped every one of our chains.” Psalms 107:13-14.

Thank God for Jesus! He specifically came here to show us another way to live. Despite this world’s cynicism, and the need for the next thing or fad to amuse us – we have the power to choose to change and BE changed. We can control our own destiny, by participating in what is good, right and profitable. We simply must deliberately choose to put down all that stuff that is often simply this life’s pollution, destroying the beauty of who we can be. You and I are the pinnacle of God’s creation! I don’t care if you have 5 billion dollars or I have one dollar to my name, we all have the capacity to grow and contribute to this world, even in our old age.

However, we cannot help others if we present them with a specially crafted front – a parody of real faith. To witness to others, we need to be real. So if we aren’t coping, then we need to tell someone. Pray! Ask for the Lord’s help. Life is a process and nobody is perfected yet! Lastly, as we live our lives, we cannot afford to live with a skewed reality. That’s the way this world currently lives. Let’s live this life, the only one we have (!!) … knowing that even our scars can tell wonderful stories about our Saviour. Bye. 👋